Mobile Phones, Laptops, IPad, Androids, Tablets, TV, Internet, Facebook, SnapChat, Periscope, Whatsapp, Twitter, YouTube. Each and every one of these has something in common – Pressure.
Let me break this down a small bit. Kids have access to all of the above so easily in recent years. The age kids are getting mobiles now is younger than ever. 8 and 9 Year old kids are going around texting and opening social media accounts. If they reach the age of 12 and don’t have some or all of the above, society will pressure them into having it.
Our children are living in a digital age, where they are exposed to technology at such a young age. The crux of this is whether they have the technology or not, they will be under pressure. Do we actually know what they are doing with this technology though? I’ve mentioned bullying through social media before, and the devastating affect it has had on families all around the world. It’s not just bullying that is causing anxiety though, there’s a lot more to it than that.
A child feels the need that they must have a phone at a young age. All their friends have one, so they must also have it. Once they have the phone, they must get a Facebook and Twitter Account. They must see other peoples’ lives. It’s the nature of the beast. Then they must take pictures of themselves that meet the standards of their friends. If they feel the pictures are not good enough, they must then put filters on them, to make sure they look as best as they possibly can, for fear of judgement by their “friends”.
They see their parents doing this, so of course it makes perfect sense for them to act in the exact same way. Why wouldn’t they? Walk into any house around the country, and you can be assured that families are not talking with each other, they are on their phones, buried deeply in a one sided story of someone else’s life rather than being aware of what is going on around them. We are sending the message to our kids that this behaviour is normal, and it’s important to know what Mary that you used to go to school with 20 years ago is having for dinner. Doesn’t Mary have a great life? She must be living it up because her dinner looks nicer than mine.
Do we not see what we are exposing our children to? The second they open that box and turn on their shiny new phone, wish them all the best and tell them you’ll see them at some stage in the future. You won’t get any of their attention for a long time to come, the same way they didn’t get your attention that time you were checking our Mary’s roast chicken dinner.
Society has moved forward (some would argue backwards) at an alarming speed. People now must have the fastest cars, the best phones, the best internet connection, the best holidays, everything must be instant, or even better, everything must be yesterday. Ho ho, I hear you say, hang on there, isn’t that a good thing? Simple answer is No. How could it be.
Let’s talk Anxiety (you knew I would say that) Society has rocketed over the last 50 years, but as humans we are still essentially cave dwellers. We have not evolved a lot over the last few thousand years. Actually, the only thing that has actually changed in 5000 years of evolution is that our big toe is getting a little bit smaller. Our brains have remained the same, so we are still reacting to events in a biologically Neanderthal way. We may be a lot more civilised now, but our brains still react in this way.
So my question is this? How is a child supposed to keep up with all of this? The truth is they can’t. As adults, we can barely fathom a lot of what’s going on in the world now, never mind a child. As they run and run to catch that train, the driver speeds up and they’ll never actually catch it. Where does this lead us? Anxiety.
To summarise, with the crazy world of technology and such radical change in the world, how can we expect our children to avoid developing anxiety disorders?
What’s the solution I hear you ask? Well we can’t change the world, but maybe we can look at ourselves as parents and ask, am I setting the right example for my child? Do I want them growing up in a phone, or do I want them to experience the beauty of life? When you put the phone down, it will encourage them to do the same, set rules, watch out for signs of bullying, and try not let them get caught up in the imaginary world of technology, a brain doesn’t belong there.